Body Art -- Ear Gauges ???

I never have understood the big deal with body art, piercings, and ear gauges. I understand the part of this that relates to tribal customs, and the rituals of various groups of people. In those instances it seems more authentic and established as a part of their way of life. I do not understand the desire of people that want to imitate the rituals and authentic customs in order to look cool or different.

What is the thinking process that is involved with the decision to cut a hole in your ear and hang some metal

ornaments in the hole ? " Hey look at me, I am a big decoration and I need some attention from you". "You should cut a hole in your ears too and we can walk around together and scare people." 

That thinking process might be working because those people certainly scare me.

I have a few ideas for those people who are starting to feel like jumping on the "ear-hole punching" bandwagon. If you feel the need to be all pretty and decorated why not try a few of these ideas to attach to the holes in your head, or your nipples if you are crazy enough:

• Christmas Lights in Winter and Sparklers in July
• Fishing Lures --- A grim reaper muskie lure would look great in early October.
• A set of Jumper cables -- for emergency purposes.
• A matching set of lawn sprinklers to keep yourself moist.
• Tonka Trucks or John Deere Tractors
• The carcass of your favorite roadkill.
• Wind Turbines in the ear hole that make a high pitched screeching sound.
• The Jonas Brothers, or The band Van Halen
• Twinkies
• An extra pair of galoshes or slippers --- trade them out depending on the time of day.

Soon American teens will be creating new customs and rituals involving body self mutilation that will last throughout the ages. Hopefully they will decorate wisely and keep everyone fashionable as they fill the hole in their heads. America can be proud of these decorated air-heads.