Are you thirsty? ........ What are you going to do about it ? ....... Secretly take a sip from the milk jug in the fridge or take a shot of tap water from the kitchen sink ? Do you have other options available ? Of course you do, silly. Here are some other options: coffee, beer, wine, soda pop, lemonade, fruit drink, tea, energy drinks. The beverage choices could literally drive you insane with the possible options available. Inside of each of these categories the options explode to include all of the name brand varieties of coffee, beer, wine etc ... So how is the prudent and well informed consumer supposed to decide which beverages to purchase and what are the benefits, consequences, economic and psycho-social implications of those purchases. For the scientific purpose of discussion and conversation I propose that we look at a specific buying decision of mine that needs to be analyzed.
In other words .... "Why did I choose to buy a bottle of Wine with a picture of a Giant 47 pound Rooster on the Label ? "
I was looking for a bottle of wine specifically a Merlot that my wife and I could enjoy before dinner. We like wine right before eating the steaks we cook on the grill. When it comes to wine and Merlot there are a lot of options. First off, let me remind you that I am not a Rockefeller so price points are important. I will spend $10 - $20 for a bottle of wine and that is my limit. Anything over that amount gives me a serious case of buyer's remorse and no money for other interests. Within the cheap seats of the wine world there are still
a lot of options, so this is where brain power kicks in. In reality, this is more likely where impulse and delusional thinking kick in. Here I am, in the liquor department of the local grocery store chain trying to act sophisticated and mature in my choice of wine for the evening. There are plain red labels with French phrases, bright yellow labels, wine from Spain, wine from France, wine from Australia, big bottles, small bottles, funny shaped bottles, clear bottles, green bottles and sooooooo much more. I finally spotted an intersting looking bottle with the giant Rooster on the label, and instantly experienced a eureka type of moment to help guide me in all of my future wine purchases.
I really was not that interested in selecting an excellent tasting wine but actually more interested in creating an opportunity for social interaction, intellectual conversation, witty banter, and sophisticated analysis of the wine producing industry. I could elevate my social status in my circle of friends if I not only selected a unique and different wine, but also could expound on the history of the brand, and the story behind the Giant Rooster on the label. I actually envisioned a small gathering of friends at my home, all with half-full wine glasses in hand. Also in this delusional vision, I was standing in front of them and discussing the heritage of this unique Merlot and the connections to the Giant Rooster. They all nodded in appreciation of my knowledge and congratulated me in finding such a flavorful and unique wine that so intimately touched the palette. For that moment, I was the Winemaster of my fiefdom and sharing my gift to the innocent few that barely knew the treasures of the fermented fruit. It was this type of delusional thinking that caused me to buy this bottle of wine as I was determined that my selection would have a purpose.
I was quickly treated to a jolting "back to reality" slap in the face when I had arrived home with my purchase.
My wife's first comment was:
" Why did you buy this shit ? .... I hate Merlot .... What a waste of money ".
So I slinked away, into the garage with my bottle of wine and a small plastic drinking cup and started the grill
to cook some steaks. There would be no witty banter, and no sophisticated commentary about the Giant Rooster. There would be no gathering of friends and the sharing of this gift. My dream had been shattered but there is still hope for you my friends. I have included a website address for your education, entertainment, and the start of your own type of delusional thinking regarding the purchase and consumption of wine.
Choose wisely and enjoy the taste of the wine, the joy of true friendship, and the witty banter.
Catfish
Curiously all of my purchasing decisions are based solely on the basis of their marketing. This is different than "getting marketed". I review the potential pitch process for said product and imagine the "Mad Men" type responses and banter that occurs around this pitch. I generally laugh to myself and then buy whatever it is.
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